No One Could Ever Take Your Place

Today I woke up with you heavy on my mind — it’s nothing new. I thought of the first time we’d kissed, and how the entire world suddenly had meaning. I thought of the precious, flowing fountain of wonder you awoke in me; the way you made me feel; the way you placed me on a pedestal and loved me unconditionally like you did. I think of you today, my body quivering, because no matter when, no matter where, no matter how, no matter what… no one — and I mean no one — could ever take your place.

Today I walked alone. I went to our special place to think of you — it’s nothing new. I felt a warm breeze brush against my face as I sat staring at everything and nothing. I closed my eyes and imagined your gentle hand — not the breeze — caressing me, wiping away the crystalline tears that flowed like miniature rivulets down my cheek. Your ephemeral silhouette comforted me, and I reminded you that no matter when, no matter where, no matter how, no matter what… no one — and I mean no one — could ever take your place.

Today I watched a movie, not on the television, but on a blank wall — it’s nothing new. The projector in my mind played out our story: the love we gave, the love we took, the times we hurt, the way we trembled, and the way we shook; the hopes we had, the dreams we shared; the promises we made, the vows we swore — the way we cared. And inside, my heart beat that familiar pulse — no matter when, no matter where, no matter how, no matter what… no one — and I mean no one — could ever take your place.

Tonight I had dinner alone. No, I didn’t eat a single bite — it’s nothing new. I stared solemnly upon the empty chair across from me. How futile again of me trying in vain to wish you there. But I can close my eyes and wish as I always do, can’t I? I can replay from my memory those delicate words you spoke when you said, “I’ll love you always and forever.” And I’d reply softly into your ear, “no matter when, no matter where, no matter how, no matter what… no one — and I mean no one — could ever take your place.”

Tonight I’ll sleep alone. My soul will cry for you, and my essence will bleed of your memory — it’s nothing new. I’ll remember your angelic arms around me, the warmth of your breath against my neck as we’d cradle each other, surrendering to the deepest of tranquil serenity. I’ll reminisce of how we’d loved and what we’d said, and perhaps in your heart — I’d like to think — you’d felt that no matter when, no matter where, no matter how, no matter what… no one — and I mean no one — could ever take my place.

Boris Novak dabbles in film production, as well as its many other facets. He is also owner and CEO of DARK HATTER FILMS, an eclectic production company, and author of many short stories and poetical works.